sad
Hi blog,

Today I feel sad. I don't know why I feel quite so bad. I want to make it go away but I don't know how. I keep staring at my computer hoping that I will find the answer on the internet.

My parents have been out of town for a few days. I was excited to be home by myself because I can't really leave the house much when they are here. Yesterday I stayed home all day. Today was very windy but I went to run errands.
First I went to the Pendleton store in San Marino to see if they had my Vans. They were out of my size and won't get any more in. I really really want these shoes. I thought getting shoes in Thailand would make me forget these Vans but I still want them a lot. I know that I will be moving soon and will have to buy things like furniture and a new jacket, so I am reluctant to order these shoes for $68 plus shipping. We'll see.
Next, I went to the Arboretum to see if they had volunteer application forms. The ones they had said junior volunteer. I figured the ticket lady assumed that I was a junior when she pointed me to the forms so I didn't ask her for an alternate. We'll see if I actually follow through with this.
I have been wanting to go to Whole Foods to try to find this diva cup. That may be too much information for many of you, but it sounds great to me. I did not see it in the store. I guess I should have asked someone but I wasn't sure how to describe it if that someone did not know what I was talking about. I am reluctant to order this online too because I don't want to pay for shipping.
The highlight of my day was the trip to Oreans Health Express which Lillian recently wrote about on Okay Noodle. The quesadilla was delicious, especially the corn, sunflower seed tortilla. I also had a vanilla carob soy ice cream shake that was great. After that, I went to Target to look at bathing suits. All of them are adorned with ugly things like beads and braids. Why are there so many bottoms left without matching tops? It was like that at H&M too. I know the two pieces are sold separately, but who actually wears red polka dots with rainbow stripes? My original plan had been to end my day at Violet's Cakes to try the famed cupcakes, but I figured the shake was enough sugar for the day. I also wanted to avoid 5:00 Pasadena traffic, so I just headed home.

In summary, I had very little success on my shopping trip.
My stomach feels bad and I don't feel like moving at all.

I feel this weird divide between myself and my parents recently. I feel like I don't want to tell them anything about my life anymore. This makes my mom really sad which makes me even sadder. Isn't it wrong that I am 22 years old and excited my parents are out of town so that I can go to Whole Foods without being questioned as to why I am going and how long I will be gone? I gave my mom my e-mail password while I was in Colorado because I needed her to look up a confirmation number for me. She continued to check my e-mail while I was gone and inform me of things that I needed to take care of. If I mention anything that I need or want to do, she will continuously ask me if I have done it. If someone calls me on our home phone, they will ask exactly who it was and what they wanted. After they left, my mom called me to remind me that I need to take off the house alarm before leaving the house. I am not that forgetful. I know they don't mean to, but they make me feel like I cannot be trusted to follow through with anything in my life. Okay, that is my rant.

My next entry will not be about my life, I hope. I think it will be about Heather Mills instead.
- posted by Lyndsay @ 7:58 PM